July is here and with it come the “Julys.” To me, the Julys are the state of being after the school year is concluded indicated by lethargy, work avoidance, and a plethora of family festivities. I’m home after a serious dose of lake time, Iowa grandson time, and my extremely smart and amazingly beautiful niece’s wedding in Houston.
Yesterday, I was like a frog on a lily pad, sedentary and still. Today, I have been chiding myself toward getting on with the work I’ve let sit for too long. I do not seem to be wandering toward the completion of it in some practiced, systematic way. A student teacher of mine once told me that I am organized just not in a lineal fashion. I own that statement. Today’s goals include laundry, completing this blog, creating a timeline for my YouTube videos, and unpacking my suitcases.
In my journeys, I saw two very different quotes that made me take note. The first caused me to snort with laughter and has me wanting to write SMH or LOL.
I’m self-employed, so if you hear me talking to myself, don’t interrupt. I’m having a staff meeting.
This is so true in my teacherprenuer life. Often my talking to myself is about scheduling or the generally continuous to-do list generation. It can be a bit overwhelming at times and saying it out loud helps this auditory learner keep track of the minutia.
Sometimes, I have out loud brainstorming sessions. I try to contain them within my head, letting my heart be the director. Every so often, my muse, who I call Smarty Star, shouts out an ingenious idea and I open my mouth and out it pours. Smarty Star is just not a quiet muse. Fortunately, these outbursts by this muse of mine occur at home or in the car. It can be embarrassing to suddenly say “Hula hoops!” in the produce section of Marianos or “B-B-B!” walking down the stairs at school. At the grocery store, I can at least pretend to be talking on the phone. At school, they already know I could be considered eccentric.
The other quote was on a sign:
Thinking “Here goes nothing” could be the start of everything.
I should have this emblazoned on my forehead. Holy Cow! That pretty well defines how I live my life. Some people prefer to go slowly and analyze every step before they make a change. I’m completely seat-of-the-pants. I have always been a dive into the deep end of the pool girl rather than slide in inch-by-inch. I listen to my heart, check with my gut, and go. So many of the changes, usually for the better, in my life have been “Here goes nothing.”
That is not to say that I don’t plan. I am a champion list maker. In fact, not knowing my basic need issues causes me a lot of stress. Those root chakra needs – income, housing, transportation- pull me down and get out of balance quickly. I practice trust in my Higher Power, in my guides, and in myself quite a bit. It’s simply that when I listen carefully and hear a message loudly, I act and then trust.
Being self-employed can cause my knees to buckle or seize up with anxiety. I try not to let it show. Last year was better than the year before and this year promises even more. I have thought about leaving teaching mindfulness and going back to teaching to enrich to those basic needs. Those thoughts last for just a few minutes and then I realize that my life purpose is my life purpose and it’s simply crazy to ignore that. So, I mutter to myself to “Suck it up, buttercup” or “Put your big girl pants on, Lee-Ann, and quit whining.” I put my hand on my heart and listen. It hasn’t steered me wrong yet.
I guess the Julys give me a chance to be reflective after the frantic pace of my crazy life. Still I’m on the go. After all, it is only the middle of the month and I have made three trips which included hilarious sister, grandsons, and neighbor time. Memories were made, and lessons were learned. I’ve just squeezed reflection in during car rides, airplane flights, and waiting at Costco for my tire with a nail to be fixed.
As I write this, I now see why I’m a lump on the sofa in the evenings. I’m curl up with my tablet, busily talking to myself – I mean- having staff meetings, planning the next “Here goes nothing.”
I heartily encourage trying the "Here goes nothing" technique just remember to check with your heart first. And if I see you talking to yourself, I won't judge.
I hope your Julys are filling you with relaxing, soul-nourishing memories. I’d love to hear about them.
All my love,
Lee-Ann